For anyone not in project management, I feel I need to metaphor some of this. OP was told that she needed to write the Official Best Cat Mom Ever Shirt ahead of time. Completely finished and fact-checked for events that haven’t happened and may never. This is also something someone else kinda started writing down in a bar while drunk. And flirting with someone so you have to transcribe what they were thinking and jotted down and NO they can’t help. When she was 70% done she just said “nope”. And pressed pause on her part and then just sit back and watch. And that children, is why you don’t mess with Subject Matter Experts that have agilely scummed through a waterfall of stakeholders.
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So, I’m getting into PM work and more or less accidentally filled an Official Best Cat Mom Ever Shirt in a sort of niche coordinator role. I work with a PM that is finally realizing that not listening to SMEs. And pushing blame is what is causing management to put a foot in his ass and treat others as the point people. Thankfully it’s all pinned on him and I’m finally getting needed control over resources from his management. My husband is in project management so I hear and have heard all the gory stories and things you have described! He has 25 years of PM and Director level experience and is still in the field.
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As an SME who has babysat a few PMs, I second this. My best one was last year when their initial draft plan for an Official Best Cat Mom Ever Shirt. We test in production… but that’s mainly because the real-life scenarios are so fubar. Our testers could not think them up. Now to be fair once we find an issue we write unit tests for it. And put it into the full regression test plan, but like most systems, real data is a bitch. And when you are chewing through millions of records cobbled together by some of the cheapest fucking companies in the US. They don’t validate the integrity of their own data that is a recipe for issues.
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