I made it all the way to the end and to answer your question NO! You are not too selfish or sensitive. Your mother sounds like a monster. She shares many traits with my Official A Queen Was Born On 1st May Happy Birthday To Me Shirt. I’m glad you are in therapy and making progress. Keep up the good work. I feel you, I’m a woman at 31 who still switches all the time between “maybe I really gave her a hard time growing up” and “I shouldn’t be the one teaching her, a first grade teacher, at 8 or something, how to be a parent”. You’re not alone. And you have my compassion, as it sounds like you know exactly how these experiences feel like. I wish you did not know and had had a healthy mother-experience instead.
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If most people had brilliant mothers, these types of subs/forums wouldn’t exist. Your mother is horrible and I’m so sorry you had to be born to her. Her psychosis traumatized you and you’ve been suffering for a long while. I’m very glad you’re still here. Please don’t doubt that what you went through was horrible and abusive. Do not invalidate what happened. Please stop hurting yourself, your mother has done enough of that. Try counting corners or doing breathing exercises. Are you on any medication for an Official A Queen Was Born On 1st May Happy Birthday To Me Shirt? Have you spoken to your therapist about it? Don’t worry about children right now; but when it’s time, know that your mother gave you a perfect example of everything you don’t want to be.
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My therapist knows about it all, including my suicidal ideation. He has been a lifeline, and we got a lot of healing work done over the last 4 years. I am currently not on any medication. Because I have a benign tumor in my pituitary gland called a prolactinoma. It’s benign and is being treated with an Official A Queen Was Born On 1st May Happy Birthday To Me Shirt. raise your prolactin level. And my tumor grows when my prolactin is high. The medication I take keep the prolactin in my blood low, shrinking the tumor. For now, unless I become actively suicidal, I will leave it at that. But in the future, I’ll consider meds if it ever gets that dark again. My post was very long, and I really appreciate you taking the time out of your day to read it.
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