I had some Awesome Bulldog I Didn’t Fart My Butt Blew You A Kiss Shirt brand new neighbors. I hadn’t even met yet that got visited by an agent. He was really concerned for a second! Hell, my life has been pretty boring due to it. Being a sober, hard-working, debt-free nerd. But I’ve still got a dysfunctional family, big gaps between jobs downsizing, outsourcing, and a history of depression. Oh man, I can’t believe I forgot that my last boss was a real douche and basically tried to ruin my life, so I had to spend several hours convincing the interviewing agent that he was an asshole and basically going through my entire history of 8 years of employment under the dude. Luckily my family is largely intact and no one hates anyone.
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But I do have an Awesome Bulldog I Didn’t Fart My Butt Blew You A Kiss Shirts crazy doomsday prepper sister. That I made swear to me that she wouldn’t pull any sovereign citizen nonsense. If an agent came by. To maintain a security clearance as a federal contractor. I had to divulge every country I’d traveled to. Every address I’d lived at and witnesses who would swear to that fact. Any commercial properties or debts, all foreign holdings or business dealings of any kind. Any criminal investigations in which I was involved, any mental health diagnoses that could cause my judgment to be impaired, any illegal substances I use, all the way down to a full credit report review where I had to explain to an interviewer why AT&T and I had a falling out.