Well written. I like the bait and switch of the supernatural with something more mundane but equally malicious. Where did Dave hoodie mango through? Was he a ghost, though? I think he could be, but I also think he could have just escaped. I honestly think I would have liked the A Man Cannot Survive On Beer Alone He Also Needs Excavator And A Dog Paw Shirt. Implying that hoodie man Dave thought he was the only one left. And either died or escaped after leaving his note. I think the chances of him having escaped are really slim. Though, if only because they were being tracked and were surrounded by hundreds of miles of snowy, desolate wasteland. Great, now I’m sad(der).
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I’m sorry for what happened. I can’t help wondering how OP could see the man in the orange hoodie when he first got to the facility though. I thought the man in the A Man Cannot Survive On Beer Alone He Also Needs Excavator And A Dog Paw Shirt. That would explain how he knew about everything. I read it as the orange hoodie guy hid in the facility. And pretended to be early or something for the next mission. I kept thinking at the beginning, ‘that guy in the orange hoodie is a ghost, I KNOW it’. Then by the end, I had completely forgotten about him until the last line. Surprise chills. Amazing stuff. Your writing ability made it enjoyable to read all the way through.
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Good story, and it seems you had a lot of good feedback telling you to turn it into a screenplay or something similar. I think it has potential, but a few things bothered me and figured I’d add some constructive criticism if you want to adapt it. First off, Antarctic research stations are not underground. The ice is always moving slowly because of the surface. Even in summer is essentially the A Man Cannot Survive On Beer Alone He Also Needs Excavator And A Dog Paw Shirt. Moreover, the snow would cover the facility and they’d never get out in the even of a blizzard. Also, calling their vehicle an SUV, even outfitted with those half-track things doesn’t make a lot of sense. The vehicles they usually use look more like the one at the end of the shining.
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